Here is my advice on improving relationships. If you’re going to make any resolutions for 2015, make sure at least one of them is for a better relationship. This year we will…
1. Schedule time together
Set aside an evening once a week, or a part of a day at the weekend, that will be your time together. You don’t have to go away or spend lots of money – but do something together. And it doesn’t have to be exclusive, either. Once these times are scheduled in, make them a priority. Treat them as you would an important appointment, and don’t give yourself the option to cancel. Its never too late to focus in improving relationships.
2. Talk to each other
Make sure you regularly talk to each other about how each other’s day is going, funny things that might come up, thinking of you texts or emails during the day. Take 10-15 minutes each day of uninterrupted time together sitting face to face every evening with no distractions to share your news and talk about anything that’s concerning you, whether it has to do with work, the children, the house or your extended family. Make time to be in touch with what’s going on in each other’s world.
3. Be selfish
It’s unrealistic to expect to be together all the time and improving relationships, and happy couples understand that each partner will need some time on their own. Be considerate of your own self and your own need for private time. If you feel good because you are looking after yourself well, that’s going to show in your relationship. You’ll feel sexier and your partner will benefit from that – so never feel guilty about enjoying some pampering.
4. Mention good – and bad
You need to be secure enough with your partner to speak up if something isn’t right. So often, couples form a kind of ‘mutual appreciation society’ where they feel frightened to rock the boat. If you can’t say what’s making you unhappy, then it will fester – and it won’t sort itself out.
5. Take a break from the children
Finding someone you can trust to look after your children for you on a regular basis is one of the biggest favors you can do for your relationship. It’s a way to salvage that valuable ‘You’ time and it’s good for the children, too. So many times I see couples where the parents have become submerged under the demands of parenthood and have forgotten they are a couple.