Austin Matchmaker

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Avoid These Mistakes When Dating In Austin

As a Professional Matchmaker, I tell all my clients to avoid these mistakes when dating in Austin. There are many factors involved when you are dating in Austin, over some of which we have no control. Chemistry is the strongest and most subconscious element that will determine if there is to be a date number two, three, four, and so on. However, there are several mistakes many single individuals make when it comes to their expectations in the dating arena.

I have noted several key mistakes daters frequently make below, which is keeping many of them in the “Single” category:

Impatience – Expecting instant fireworks when you are dating in Austin the moment after leaving the first date. Even the strongest potential chemistry can be eclipsed by impatience. It is proven that chemistry, especially for women, can develop over a period of time, usually between the third or even fifth date. Personality, charm, morals, character, interests all lead to long term potential. Men, we know by now that you are visual, but the same rule applies.This is one of the  mistakes to avoid when dating in Austin.

Revealing too much too soon – Yes, we all have some history whether it ex-wives, husbands, girlfriends, boyfriends, bosses, weight issues, etc. When you are dating in Austin, nothing kills mystery faster than releasing a tell-all account of everything under the sun of your thespian life. Mystery is elemental in cultivating an attraction that will last for the months to come.

If you have the “I am who I am, so take me or leave me” mentality, then you will remain single – guaranteed. Certainly, it is true that once in a committed relationship, you take on one another’s foibles by choice after the emotional bond has been secured. But your date doesn’t owe you his emotional support and steadfast dedication, particularly upon first meeting you.

Unrealistic expectations – This is directed toward the mindsets that include the following “beliefs”. I want a man that is super successful but has a lot of free time to spend with me. Or  he has to be tall, and handsome, and have no children, and have mutual chemistry.” Or “I want a woman who is gorgeous, and thin, and educated, and has a good job, and is normal and positive She has no baggage, and who can travel with me and is younger. She is not interested in my money, and…and…and.” 

If success is what you are ultimately seeking when dating in Austin, even that comes with a sacrifice.

And men, if you’re asking for a girl 20 years your junior to want to date you for the person you are and not what you can provide, you may as well spend your weekends in the Pacific Northwest hunting Sasquatch. You want the whole package? Well, so does every one else on this planet. Setting the bar too high in a lot of cases, will in due course pick you out of the pickings.

It’s like the old adage goes: beggars can’t be choosers. In the end, it should only matter that you are with a decent person who loves, respects and cherishes you, and will be your best friend. Expect even that physical chemistry to fade after a couple years together. What is left from that should be the determining factor in being with the person.

Not minding your manners – It’s pretty basic, people. Gentlemen, open the door for the lady and allow her to walk in first, pay for the dinner and, please, do not forget her valet. Ladies, be appreciative and say “Thank you” for the date, for him picking you up, whatever. Don’t talk all about yourself too much, engage in the other person, ask questions and know your turn will come. To all daters: table manners are key, as are personal hygiene. Keep this on the list of dating mistakes to avoid when dating in Austin.

Allowing a photo to determine “chemistry” – This statement in and of itself is ludicrous and close-minded. Chemistry is defined as “the interaction of one personality with another”. With that said, you can not establish chemistry by looking at a photograph.

It is my personal belief that most of my clients look much better in person, especially the men.

Not only that, but chemistry is all concluded in the face-to-face interaction and personal rapport with someone else. Seeing them at different angles with their various facial expressions and cute idiosyncrasies in a natural relaxed setting is much more accurate. Awkwardly slapping on a fake smile and cheesy pose for a photograph cannot bethe only evidence for chemistry.

In conclusion, taking the time to shake their hand may just land you the love of your life.

Keep in mind when you are dating in Austin that there is always someone out there who is richer/prettier/more marketable than you – If this sounds harsh, it is just a reminder to keep your ego in check. If you think you are God’s gift to the single world, yet you are still single, maybe some introspection is in order.

If you have this attitude coupled with the notion that you deserve the best of the best and no one is good enough for you, then they will get the hint that they’re not good enough, and leave you standing in their dust. There are plenty of people out there without a never-ending checklist of their “perfect mate”. These are people who are easier to get along with. They look 10 times better than someone with a bar set to boundless heights. Dating is about respect, reality, and most importantly, humility.