The Valentine’s Day marketing machine and the quest for social acceptance can make “Singles Awareness Day” dreary or even cruel if you’re alone whether by choice or circumstance. It’s hard to see what else life has to offer when you’re bombarded with romantic comedies on TV, flowers, jewelry commercials forcing you to think Valentine’s Day is about love when its really about the St. Valentine’s Massacre! (I don’t think every kiss really begins with Kay!), cutesy heart-shaped trinkets in the stores, and never-ending advertisements and event announcements.
It’s only one day out of 365, why do we all feel so much pressure to be happily coupled up? If you think about it, Valentine’s Day is a dumb thing that happens to us every year against our will.
Here’s some advice from a Professional Matchmaker on how to deal with Valentine’s Day.
- Embrace Being Single
Instead of feeling down about your single status, flip it in your head and tell yourself, “I’m single because I’m waiting for a good relationship, and won’t settle for anything less.” When you make positive statements, you feel a greater sense of control over your life and feel happier and proud as a result. Don’t just be confident about your single status — be a little cocky!
Feel good about the fact that you’re not like so many others, crying into their cocktails as they complain about their deadbeat boyfriends or girlfriends.
- Be Happy for Others
Just because you didn’t get a dozen roses and a box of chocolates or have someone to give them too, doesn’t mean that you should scoff at the idea. Be happy for others and admire that they are content or in a relationship where gestures of love are shown. Don’t be jealous, no one wants to date an unhappy or bitter person. And if you let yourself get to that place of resentment of other people’s happiness, you might get stuck in that hole.
- Valentine’s Day Isn’t Just for Lovers — It’s for Love!
Show those you love or those who have been extra supportive and show them just how much you appreciate and love them. Every year I buy my team a box of chocolates and I even decorate the office to let them know just how much I appreciate them. I mail cards to my nieces and nephews. How about sending flowers to your mom, sister or grandmother? Giving something to those that you love will make you feel amazing.
- Make Plans!
Find out what’s happening in the singles scene. A number of bars hold singles parties that will give you the chance to celebrate the day as an unattached person.
Don’t take your love expectations though; just go to have a great time and to discover some new people to talk to and share cocktails with.
Start planning early and decide whether you want to host a party for both single men and women, or just have “girls’ night in” with your closest single girlfriends.
- Avoid Triggers
Stay off Facebook, online dating sites/apps, don’t watch romantic movies, change the radio station if a love song comes on, don’t read old emails, love letters etc., and for God’s sake, do NOT drunk dial your ex! In fact, if you feel the urge to email, instant message, or text on the big day, stop, turn off the technology, and reboot your brain. No good can come from a weak moment down memory lane. Just say no to reconnecting with former flames! Remember that your ex is in the past for a reason, so it’s best to leave them there and fully focus on yourself this Valentine’s Day.